We braved the August heat last night to head out to a bowling alley after one of those itches hit me out of nowhere. "Let's go bowling." Similar but less successful spontaneous itches in my past have included "I'm going to color my hair platinum," "I'm going to sell Mary Kay," and "I'm going to apply for a job at Victoria's Secret." These ended in purple fried hair, a closet full of make-up I never sold, and getting banned from ever being hired by any Limited company forevermore, respectively.
But bowling? Bowling delivered.
It was Gray's 4th birthday and he was super stoked!!
Bowling, Putt Putt, Pizza, and Video Games???? Every four year old's dream!!
Grayson took right to the three-fingered grip of a bowling ball and quickly mastered the art of delivering a roll that would produce the least amount of momentum necessary to keep a ball moving. It took like three minutes for the ball to make it to the end of the lane, and then pins fell in sloooooowwww motttttiiiiiooon, one by one.
Insert victory dance.
We eyeballed another preschooler with her family using some sort of miraculous bowling contraption that seemed to move the ball down the lane a tad bit quicker than snail speed.....
....so we snatched ourselves one and it was magical!
I discovered some very important things one needs to know about bowling.
Things I Discovered About Bowling:
1) That alarm that beeps when your foot slips into the slick, waxed surface of the bowling lane? It's there for a reason. You will fall. Hard. Like arms in the air and legs parallel to the ground kind of fall. Just ask my husband.
2) If you forget socks, you can buy them at a bowling alley. From a vending machine, and they're only jacked up six times the regular cost of socks.
3) Bowling shoes are adorable. Keep telling yourself that.
4) Unlike golf, low scores don't win. Shoot.
5) No matter how many times your husband tries to pay off the music control guy to stop playing Nickelback, he won't.
6) Wow, I really do know all the words to Nickelback's "Far Away"......and it gives Kevin the heebie jeebies.
7.) Not everyone thinks it's funny when you talk in a Southern accent all night and holler "Hallelujah, sweet Baby Jesus" after anyone strikes.
8.) Waving your arms like this to make the ball go to the right does not make the ball go to the right.
9.) If you throw the ball so cockeyed, it bounces in another lane, someone will get it for you.
10.) While waiting for your next turn to bowl, you can kill time by choreographing spare and strike victory dances, disappearing before everyone's very eyes....while sneakily drinking your sippy cup,
giving fake bowling lessons or impersonating Main Event tour guides even though there is no such thing as a Main Event tour. But if there was, it would begin with "Here at Main Event, we..." In a thick Southern accent, of course.
It was fun--being all holed up, literally, in a dark cool alley, while outside was a scorching 105 degrees at 7pm.
105 temps can make you do strange things. Very strange.
Yay Summer.
Sister wanted only one thing--to break free from the shackles of her stroller and high-tail it down the lane.
She got close once, but struck out, no pun intended. Okay, totally intended.
We dined on high class pizza and cheese fries and split a few pitchers of much-needed "adult yumminess" and bowled our hearts out.
We then ventured over to the 9 hole putting green that we turned into our very own 81 hole putting green......it was a Monday night and the place was a ghost town.
And our genius 4 year old quickly figured out that when the ball drops into the hole on "9", you just have to reach down, turn the key to the lock box, and Waah La......there's your ball!
After a few hours of bowling and golfing and pizza eating, we were all worn out.....and Sissy was out of snacks and out of patience. How dare we not let her crawl around that immaculate bowling facility????
It was a picture perfect night with our little family of four.
Happy 4th Birthday Little Man!!
~Mommy
