Ummmm.....hi...my son just drank some Germ X, what should I do?
Well, how much did he ingest, mam?
Hmmmmmm....I'm not sure.....two tablespoons?
Tablespoons or teaspoons?
Tablespoons.....I think....I don't know, it was a full bottle and now it's missing like 3 inches but some, er most of it's on his clothes.
Okay mam.....stay calm. Germ X is about 70% ethanol. You know, alcohol, so as we all know alcohol affects children quicker than adults. So we need to look for signs. Is he slurring his speech?
Ummmm, well he's 19 months so he doesn't really have speech yet.....I mean he has some words, you know like....Momma, uh oh, night night, Dada....we've been working on the itsy bitsy spider and patty cake for a while now..........
Mam, is he acting tipsy? Tripping over his own feet, lethargic??
No, but I usually think I'm fine after a couple of glasses of wine when I'm really not......what if, oh my gosh......what if he had too much?
Calm down, mam. Listen to me. Children's blood sugar can drop a lot quicker than adults.....do you have any juice? Cupcakes? Twinkies?
Yes! I have juice!! And strawberry cake that my mother in law made for my birthday.
That's good, mam. Give him that.
Should I water down his juice like normal?
No mam.....we want to give him as much sugar as we can. Do you have any candy?
I have M&M's....he LOVES M&M's!
Great. Give him candy, the cake and some juice and I will call back in an hour to check on him.
If anything changes, if he shows signs of intoxication, take him to the ER.
58 minutes later
Hello?
Hi, Mrs. Richards. I was calling to check up on Grayson.....any changes?
Well he's fine, I guess. I gave him the cake and M&M's and juice and now he's just swinging from the ceiling fan like a gremlin.
Oh, well that's probably from all the sugar.
Gee, really lady.....ya think?
6 comments:
Okay so I'm guessing this really happened so I'm trying hard to not fall to ground and laugh hysterically! REally scary I'm sure, but your responses... glad Grayson is okay :) love ya!!
yes...... just follow it with every cake, coke, and tub of ice cream in the house!Haha, too funny! Glad he's ok and germ free!! Maybe he felt a cold coming on and tried to nip it in the bud!
Oh my gosh!!!! I guess we can all laugh knowing that Grayson's okay! I really need to memorize that poison control number! Hope he's passed out cold after that sugar rush! That's one way to teach him not to drink too much alcohol! Lol! Glad he's okay! So scary!
IS this a joke? OMG that is funny and sad, and OMG Grayson please don't tell your secrets to B. Shhhh, Grayson... Shhhh!
March 12...not a good day for my 2 grandsons. One breaks his wrist while walking across the playground and tripping over his own 2 feet and now my little Tater has just consumed 2 tsp...maybe 2 TBSP of Germ X. What's up guys! Are you trying to make NANA's hair turn gray or what?
He parties just like me!
HAHAHHAAAAA
Thats a FUNNY story girl!
I am so glad he is ok!
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